Your How-To: On Creating A Self-Care Ritual
Image Credit @zoeisabellakravitz
by Taylor Allie.
When we are committed to engaging in our own personalized ritual, we are planting the seeds for the groundwork to step into our desires and reveal our true greatness. In choosing to love on myself, I have been able to experience a profound level of freedom and I believe that everyone is deserving of that.
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The most difficult lessons I have learned through my journey to self-care have been practicing self-discipline and putting in the groundwork to recreate a better version of myself. As someone who helps facilitate the healing of others, creating a life I desire calls for no room to play it small.
To be completely honest, in doing the work towards manifesting the woman I desire to be, is difficult, to say the least. And ultimately, in order for me to encourage myself to have the self-discipline to continue, I had to make it a point to turn my self-care practice into a ritual for the betterment of my womanhood.
Feelings of burnout and irritability were very familiar through this period, but when I decided to listen to my intuition, I was provided with direct access to my highest self. When we are committed to engaging in our own personalized ritual, we are planting the seeds for the growth of our own internal greatness. And as a result of my journey through this exploration of self-care, I created a five-step guide to help others turn their self-care practices into a sacred ritual.
OPERATIONALIZE
Holistic wellness has such a large bandwidth that there is an abundance of room for exploration of what it really means to us individually. Taking the time to operationalize self-care in a way that best suits your life is the first step in ensuring that your practice becomes a ritual.
Some questions I asked myself when I was looking to define what self-love and self-care were for me, were:
How can self-care serve me?
Why is self-care critical for my life?
What would loving myself look like?
How am I already practicing self-care?
What are my core needs?
This is the process of understanding the meaning of how something will personally affect our lives, so it is important to move through it with intention.
IDENTIFY
Do you notice tension in a specific area of your body when you feel stressed? In this case, yoga or massage therapy may be a practice you can explore. What about your thoughts? Do you find that you’re in a constant power struggle with them? Then maybe meditation or journaling are outlets that you can utilize as well. You might also have difficulties with loving your body like many of us do. And if so, you can opt to make some time to work up a light sweat in the gym (or elsewhere) to release the “feel-good” feels (aka, endorphins.)
Be sure to also consider a practice that is low-maintenance (reading, deep breathing, or a nature walk) for the days when you’re simply not feeling it. Your self-care practice should be something that brings you relief, so take your time when identifying what works for you.
ORGANIZE
Remember, there is more to this than just noting things in your planner. It is actually the first step to realizing what you need before jumping in and making changes in your life— it’s kind of a big deal. Think of it as a life-scan to make sure that the plan itself will actually be effective.
Ask yourself where and when you have the time for your self-care practices in your daily life. Be honest about what you can prioritize. Also note the dates in your week that are usually more stressful than others, as these might be the days to amp up on your practice or even consider just resting.
APPLY
Here, is where we put in the work. This is where we look directly at our fear and let it go.
When putting your practice in motion, pay attention to any emotional, behavioral or thought patterns. These can give insight on how your ritual resonates with you on a cellular level. Another great way to be self-aware about where we are in our progress is by surveying those closest to us. Our relationships are our mirrors, and oftentimes the people that know us well are able to reflect our blind spots back to us.
ACTUALIZE
After applying, and really doing the work, you will inevitably be filled with light. The work itself has always been to discover the light that shines within, the light that connects us all to source, the light that guides us through our darkness, and the light that brought about our being. The final stage of ritualizing is the commitment to management, growth, and sustainability – all of which are byproducts of consistently showing up for yourself. Continue to offer yourself love, self-compassion, and room to change your mind about whatever you’d like. Even if you stray, the work you’ve done will be your guide back home to self.
Everyday will not be the same, but keep in mind that this is guiding you through creating the life you desire.
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We can choose to fall into the dichotomy of what wellness is and is not, but the fun is in the grey area. The joy is in prioritizing whatever we need to feel good and cared for by ourselves. The catharsis is in being compassionate and honest when deciding to honor ourselves in the way(s) that we see fit. Whatever your choice is of ritualistic practices, stand firmly in them, and allow them to carry you through your evolution. Self-care is not just cute, it is critical, and it is ours to claim when ready.
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Taylor Allie is a Maryland/DC-based wellness professional. Taylor is also the founder and Editor-in-Chief of Well Wildflower
Connect with Taylor via social: @bloomwithtaylor